Pays Aux Mille Temples: Reflections on A Foreign Land
Long story short, I was granted the opportunity to participate in the student outbound program of the Institute of Molecular Biosciences of Mahidol University, Bangkok, Thailand, and it was there that I was introduced to the inner workings of the laboratories involved in their Neuroscience Department, for an entire month. Setting foot on a seemingly sacred land with its overly nice and welcoming people here led me to reflect on my experience and to grow as not only as an academician but also as a person.
First and foremost, I'd like to thank the Dean, the Vice Dean and Head Coordinator of the Medical Studies Program of the Faculty of Medicine for approving our appeal for a program equivalency (KKN Penyetaraan), and the Office of International Affairs (OIA) for accepting our application for the student outbound for Mahidol University, and the various staffs who dealt with various paperwork for us, and our peers who helped coordinate the administrations for our program equivalency en masse. I'd also like to thank my parents for generously sponsoring my travels, my roommates for not attempting any harm during our time together, the few friends whom I could trust and enjoy my time with, and the friends of the friends who showed exemplary nonchalance.
I voluntarily assigned myself to the Neuroscience Department after a one-week workshop of an introduction to basic laboratory skills and concepts like micropipetting, gel electrophoresis, PCR, molecular cloning laboratory safety, cell culture, and an introduction to vaccines. It was also during the group designation that I was introduced to my supervisor. Thanks to her generosity, I was not only given the time to explore her lab and her research, but also the lab of various other lecturers of the same department, which I will run through below.
Cellular to Animal: The Leap of Methods
During the first few days, I was granted the opportunity to be involved in the cell culture laboratory under the supervision of a lab veteran who has allegedly been working for almost half a century and is an expert in IVF, and this one post-grad student who is also physician from Myanmar. It was there that I got to witness the lab vet's unmatched agility in performing cell culture protocols, and also the one-century-old incubation machine in the lab for unused growth media. It was also there that I got to see the immunohistochemistry result of the samples that the doctor had prepared in advance, which unfortunately showed unsatisfactory results due to an inaccurate antibody concentration. I admire his curiosity and experimental attitude, and also his willingness to troubleshoot the problem and admit his mistake, as well as his his eagerness to put up with our out-of-place questions. Besides that, I would like to extend my gratitude towards him for looking after us, albeit for a very short while, and towards the lab assistant for being very nice and understanding towards our newbie heads.
It was also in the same lab rotation that I got to visit the same animal unit my seniors did. Along with a lab veterinarian and also another veterinarian in pursuit of her Ph.D., I got to take a peek into her research, that is the comparison of blood between Y-type mice and BKO mice, basically a model for b-thalassemia. They had performed splenectomy on both kinds, and the blood sample was to be observed by thick Giemsa staining and reticulocyte counting to study the severity of its effects on both types, so for one day we worked in the Thalassemia Department along with both vets, and it was there that we got to refresh our memory on clinical pathology and our blood-smearing competence. I have nothing but profound respect for both vets as it was only the two of them against dozens of mice blood samples and counting thousands of erythrocytes manually, yet they still have it in them to keep up a positive attitude and a calm composure towards our seemingly fatal mistake, that is carelessly sandwiching the two blood smears face-up inside the Giemsa stain.
Besides that, we were taught about Novel Object Recognition Test, Open Field Test, and Morris Water Maze Test by a physical therapist looking into working with animals for her post-grad thesis. I couldn't remember why she was doing novel object recognition test on mice but I appreciate her running us through the various behavioural tests for animals, specifically rodents. Respectively, the mentioned tests were to evaluate recognition ability (which obviously requires memory), anxiety-like behaviour, and long-term memory. Unlike the previous yearās batch, we didnāt get to perform any hands-on test, but instead we were shown some example recordings of the tests that had been done previously. I think Iād rather have it that way as I was too scared of unintentionally infecting the samples, or harming them.
In addition to the few days in the cell culture lab, we were also brought along to work with another lecturer and the few students under his tutelage, those are some fellow medical students from Dubai, and some peers of the same batch who had been assigned to the same Neuroscience Department under a different supervisor. I was grateful to spend some time with the other international students as they showed me a superb example of assertiveness and confidence, and also a fine balance of professionalism, humour, and lenience. Observing my peers' interaction with them also taught me that the best way to befriend anyone was to simply be genuine, even if it means to defenestrate all intentions of impressing the other person. Our time in this lecturer's was very brief that we barely touched the surface of various techniques like Western blot, cell culture, immunohistochemistry, and PCR. My heart still goes out to him for his hospitality and concern towards us despite having little involvement or contribution in his lab, and his patience in dealing with my seemingly sheepish peers.
During our final day in the cell culture lab, the head of the lab ran us through an explanation of telemetry, that is very much like an EEG recording done in animals, in a more invasive manner. Instead of wearing an electrode cap, you have to surgically insert a subcutaneous probe into your samples, which in this case are mice. For that, we got to witness a craniectomy involving a stereotaxic aperture, basically to drill very fine holes into the skull at a certain depth, as the procedure also required the insertion of wires above the durameter. We also got to learn that surgeries for animals didnāt require as much sterility as human patients, and there was this technique that only required the sterility of the instrument tip in disregard to everything else, including the body of the instrument ā efficient but bold ā the āsterile tip principleā.
Finally, despite merely shadowing the team, I was generously rewarded with a Krispy Kreme doughnut and some snacks from the lab workers, a few of whose name I couldnāt remember, and for that Iād like to apologize ā as I should, as they had treated me with so much warmth despite my brief attendance and lack of contribution. I would like to also express my deep gratitude to the head of the lab for her willingness to spare the time to teach us despite her very busy schedule, and for her patience and accommodation towards us, and also for her motivation for us. I was touched by what she said, that was āI wish I could have you around till the end of the month, too bad you have to rotate to other labs,ā and indeed she brought us to the other lab herself: the human EEG lab, going to the extent of introducing us to them in person.
The Humane Human EEG Lab
In contrast to the other neuroscience labs, the EEG lab was ornamented with various colourful posters and whimsical stickers, along with an assembly of innocent plushies and animal-patterned throws to warm not only the bodies of cold lab members but also the hearts of every oncoming visitors. Our entire time in the EEG lab was accompanied by an awkwardly affable clinical psychologist working towards her doctoral degree alongside her friend, a bit too quiet but eager MD who got to take on the same doctorate program, and some loyal disciples: a masterās degree student who looks no older than a high school student, a psychology undergrad working as a research intern in IMB, and a voluntary intern looking for lab experience before heading to Wuhan for her pre-clinical studies. Occasionally, another PhD student who happened to be a weeb would also be there with us to also hang out in the lab.
It seems that note-taking was an act of intimidation among the lab members as theyād be terrified when I started taking the lab a bit too seriously. Maybe they knew that I was merely taking notes to keep myself busy and awake, and for that they were right to urge me to explore around the lab and take me around campus for high-noon walks and lunch at the various canteens, and for that I was very grateful. It was also thanks to them that I could navigate around campus site all alone with confidence. Their hospitality showed no bounds as our main supervisor for this rotation would shove me with snacks almost every time I entered the lab and treat me to various meals all while saying āNo, it's fine! Youāve been a very good student,ā and when asked why, all she would say is āYou guys are far from home so I want to make sure this can be a second home for youā.
This lab rotation felt a lot more like daily hangouts than studying as the EEG protocols we did felt like more like games than chores. It is as simple as placing electrodes and a cap with conducting gel. The recording consisted of an eye-opened and eye-closed state that served as both a baseline for recordings of other states, depending on the requirement of the study at the time. The recorded cortical lobes consisted of the frontal, temporal, parietal, and occipital, in addition to some areas of the mastoideus and ocular muscles, merely for control, that is to confirm that certain recording artefacts are indeed eye movements, and to make sure that the cap is not out of place. The recording does take a while but it is always followed by a rewarding hair spa treatment done by no other than our supervisor.
We were also given a little overview of the mechanics of EEG recording by the head of the EEG lab, in addition to an invitation to a conference on the most recent innovation products in the field. It was here that we got to see the improved versions of EEG including a stabilized recording made possible for physical movements like sports and gymnastic, and an fNIRS and EEG hybrid cap, making simultaneous recording possible without interference. I also got to see other various applications of EEG outside laboratory and diagnostic functions, like a possibly practical use for gaming and physical rehabilitation.
I got to understand where the lab members obtained their wholesomeness despite our very brief meeting with him. To think that he would greet us with a whole-hearted smile and patiently wait for our answers with a grin as to encourage us instead of shutting us down despite our stupidity and seemingly lack of enthusiasm. It was also his suggestion that the interpretation of our results are to be done by them and sent to us, as we were only given a peek into the data processing and interpretation. The interpreted result alone is already enough to serve as a souvenir, but he decided to top it up with a physical merchandise of Mahidol University, for which I would like to express my deep gratitude by cherishing it and making good use of it.
I wouldnāt be surprised if our supervisor and the others were mentally taxed after a whole few days of being overly nice, but even then they still had it in them to say that I was welcomed to visit to their lab, and I was free to do so whenever I pleased, and indeed whenever I pleased, there they would welcome me. Out of guilt, out of conscience, out of nicety, out of whatever they had in them to still put up with me, I appreciate them deeply for their warmth and hospitality when I could barely find it elsewhere and when I didnāt want to quite return to my dorm just yet, and I cannot express the shame I feel for not being able to reciprocate their kindness to the same extent.
Jack of All Trades
The head of the lab, and the only one there, started off saying āpeople would rather flee from biochemistry and physics, so Iām sorry if this lab doesnāt quite align with your interest.ā As much as I thought it seemed out of place in the Neuroscience Department, I think her being there was a very unique addition as it provided additional perspective to a predominantly biological field. And to her statement, Iād say nonsense ā whatever we are given, that is what we will learn. Unfortunately, as much as we tried our best, I can understand why people would rather not touch biochemistry or physics. Both are very difficult subjects.
Whether that was what motivated her to say āI think you are a very good student,ā or whether she was just saying so to be nice for the sake of saving my feelings, that pushed me even further to understand her lab exercises and materials. And for her to say āI feel like you have this very positive atmosphere about you,ā which Iām not sure if she meant or again, was just doing so to be nice, felt very flattering, and I could say the same for her. The fact that she kept up an overall positive attitude towards us despite our difficulty handling the topics and our constant technical hiccups in her lab goes to show that the positive atmosphere mostly came from her.
It was not only that that motivated me, but also her innovative and revolutionary ideas, most of which involve a multidisciplinary approach, taking the simplest concepts to make a never-thought-of solution for real-world problems, with her most prominent example being screening tools based off the most niche but simple biomarkers for various diseases, all while taking a noninvasive approach.
To think that we were given a glimpse into her unpublished work and shown a demonstration of her experiment should probably be considered a flattery as it was as if we were entrusted with some sort of secret that we should keep, as we were specifically told not to explain about her ongoing research in detail just yet. Another demonstration we were shown on biosensor modification for sensitivity enhancement, while seemingly quite simple, involved concepts of chemical reactions from high school which we needed to review. Not only that, it showed us the potential of various compounds we never thought of, and of the practical application of principles we were only taught in theory of.
Besides guiding us meticulously through her demonstrations, she also helped revise our presentation voluntarily, and in fact asked us to send it to her in the first place, which I think strongly helped us take accountability of the assignment we were given. Throughout the revision process, I was surprised how egalitarian she was with us as it was hardly found in the Asian culture which strongly emphasized on seniority. I appreciated how she valued our opinion and took them into consideration, even going to the lengths of considering us her friend.
I would like to extend my gratitude towards our supervisor of this rotation for entrusting us with the details of her ongoing research and for creating a safe space for us to explore knowledge, especially one that we were barely familiar with, and for being extremely patient with us and treating us as friends. I would also like to express my respect for her for keeping up an optimistic attitude towards her lab despite having barely any enthusiasts. I hope she finds more students that will take on some interest in her work as I think she deserves it.
The Research of Researches
The next lab rotation took place with one of the most renowned lecturers of the department, and also the Head of the Department, if Iām not mistaken. He exuded a strong sense of authority and probably demanded the same amount of strong respect from us, which I dread I didnāt properly show, and for that I deeply apologize.
He ran us through a lecture of the various researches done by various post-grad students he had supervised within the theme of neurodegeneration and neuroinflammation in cognitive impairment, and the recent findings and theories that supported his ongoing research, which is to find the link between mitochondrial dysfunction and neuroinflammation and neurodegeneration by using cell models. At least that is what I understand.
Throughout the lecture he also quizzed us on various topics which I think I answered poorly, and also led to his disappointment. For him to still put up with us and listen to our answers probably meant he had some glimmer of hope or still valued our answers, but I very unfortunately fumbled and most likely left a bad impression on him. I should also appreciate the fact that he spared some time in his busy schedule to run the lecture himself, and that he also shared a detailed slide of his lecture for us to study.
The laboratory session consisted of mostly western blot. Although repetitive, I was still happy to discover that there are small variations of techniques, which despite appearing barbaric and careless were in fact more time-efficient and material-saving. Maybe there is no standard protocol, or maybe there is and I didnāt look much into it, but Iād like to appreciate the lab staffs and students of the lab as they gave us plenty of liberty to review the steps ourselves, or maybe we were too confident that they simply decided to leave us to our own devices. For this impression of overconfidence, Iād like to apologize.
Iād still like to thank them for tolerating our presence despite our unfavourable and probably insufferable attitude. It was around this time that I started growing frustrated about my teammate and acted out on people, leading things to grow sour. I was and still am ashamed of myself for my behaviour and my teammateās. I deeply apologize towards the people I have possibly offended. Once again, Iād like to thank everyone in the lab for being patient with us.
Lab Rotations Simplified
The head of this lab had been so kind as to comply to our request to reschedule her time with us for our sake. For that I am also deeply ashamed, and I would again like to apologize. She had emailed us a detailed rundown of the upcoming schedule during her lab rotation and also sent some materials for us to prepare ourselves.
Her labs included topics such as computer-based drug discovery, western blot, and qPCR, but among discovering that we had studied western blot during our time in the previous lab, she decided to omit the topic on western blot. I still appreciate her for her enthusiasm in teaching us, going to the extent of booking the Frontier Research Facility (FRF) specifically for an analysis of our results, or maybe she was just holding us accountable for that, and our words that āweāre here to simply learn on the techniques of western blotā, so for her to cancel all plans of that on behalf of us also put me in an uncomfortable position. For that, Iād like to also apologize to her.
The lab rundown goes that we were guided by a lab staff who happened to be a specialist of molecular structure, on the basics of the protein structure and methods to discover protein structures, as well as methods to access and analyze said data. Overall, it was explained that before running tests on various models, one has to find possible ligands that can complement the binding site of our protein of interest. To achieve this, one has to study the protein and ligand structure. He also explained that the lab rotations so far were to demonstrate the various stages of drug testing, starting from cellular to animal models. Human models will probably take some more years.
It was also him who had volunteered to introduce us to the Neuroscience Department and guided us through the first day of the cell culture lab, basically emphasizing the importance of virtual screening and drug discovery in the research field. I would like to thank him for putting up with the poorly placed questions of a some newbies and also for sparing his time to explain the various details to us, and also introducing us to the lab.
What I can pick up overall so far is that methods like western blot, immunohistochemistry, and PCR are to evaluate the cell models, that is by analyzing the proteins that they are expected to express, as certain proteins under the influence of certain drugs are expected to influence certain bodily functions in the grand scheme of things. And qPCR is one of these said methods. Under the guidance of a very pretty masterās student of that same lab at that time, we were carefully guided through the procedure, who had been generously explained and simplified by the lab supervisor herself the day before. She told us that the procedure requires very strict sterility as the samples were prone to being contaminated, especially by spit. The rest depended on time and machine, so she left the rest to us. Maybe her lateness was due to the sudden reschedule she was informed of, so I appreciate her for still compromising to us.
Finally, the supervisor, despite probably knowing the whole ordeal, still had it in her to treat us very very nicely. For that too, I am very ashamed, but I would like to thank her for showing us grace and understanding, going to the extent of saying āI hope to see you soon in the future, maybe I can meet you guys here again as famous researchers, who knows?ā Whether it was out of good graces, or out of some hope she has in us, I think itās best we take her words into heart.
Cut-Off Strand
The rotation was wrapped up by a presentation of everything we have learnt during our time there. It was to be presented to other groups and other lecturers or lecturer representative present during at the time. Everything entrusted to us finally being returned and presented to its rightful owner, I donāt think there was any other way to conclude our one month in Bangkok. It was rather anticlimactic but I think it was best that way, surrounded by the people whom I befriended along the way, cheered on by those who had hope in me despite the challenges I had, met with positive feedback. I was worn out and needed somewhere to flee. I donāt know how it was like for others, I wish they had it better.
For all the good, the bad, and the ugly, as much as Iād wish to have had it some other better way, I should be grateful for this one. It taught me that for as long as one has an ongoing personal conflict, interpersonal success will be difficult. Even then, any success will be built on a fragile foundation. This goes not only for myself but for others. I learnt that Iām not a peopleās person and that people will be people. I will struggle and so will others. I appreciate those who have understood and showed me grace, and I wish to be able to show the same towards others. I apologize to those whom I have not been kind to, and in return I wish to forgive those who have not been kind towards me.
The old saying that āthe more you know, the less you knowā is in fact true. Itās up to you where your ignorance limits you, and where your curiosity leads you. In a positive environment, it will be supported, and you will flourish, so Iām grateful to those who have put up with my questions despite how stupid they are, and Iām grateful to those who have been highly supportive of my enthusiasm. It is also true that āthe more you know, the more you sufferā. The more you gain understanding of the world, the more you will dread. Itās up to you where you seize your clutch when no one else can or will, so Iām grateful to those who have put up with strands of thoughts despite how absurd they seem, and to those who have not shunned me but attempted to ease my mind, and those who had been honest about how mentally taxing they are.
Takeaway
Iām grateful to have been granted the opportunity to explore this unfamiliar field. To be granted the time and attention is to pay with respect. To be under tutelage is to be held responsible for gained knowledge. To stand among those who hold nothing but good will to be cherished. To be pardoned one's mistakes and ignorance is to be reflected upon. To make this work, despite being highly flawed, is to record meaning for myself.